Because Netflix's Queer Eye is this good.

I did.  I binge-watched Queer Eye Season 2 like it was going out of style and LOVED every moment of it.  My life is literally better having experienced the journey of the new Fab Five.  If you aren’t familiar, the streaming Netflix show Queer Eye is an updated spin on the original Fab Five from Bravo’s Queer Eye for the Straight Guy in 2003.  In the original show, the guys set out to transform lives and increase awareness and tolerance.  In the updated show, the men set out to not only increase tolerance but also acceptance, equality, radical positivity, and love for all.  At the end of the season, I felt like they were all my best friends. 

On June 20th, NPR Morning Edition interviewed Jonathan Van Ness (grooming) and Antoni Porowski (food), 2 of the 5 new men in Queer Eye (http://bit.ly/NPRqueereye).  The interview made me laugh and smile and I was inspired to write this blog.  The interview highlighted the underlying theme of self-care and spreading love.  We see this a lot in our plastic surgery office – men and women (especially nurturer personalities) who have focused so much on taking care of others that they forget or become too busy to take care of themselves. 

It happens gradually.  First it is canceling the hair appointments that you used to enjoy, then canceling the nail salon/waxes/facials/massages, then canceling lunch or dinner with your group of friends, then you stop fixing your hair, then you stop caring as much what you are wearing or the impression of yourself that you present, then maybe you go a few days without wearing makeup, then it spreads to how you organize your home and how you approach your life.  Then you wake up and look in the mirror and wonder who is staring back and how you got here.  And you just feel so tired!  It is easy to get busy and neglect ourselves.  It is easy to neglect so many aspects of our inner and outer lives. 

I believe from personal experience that it is easy to get in a rut.  It is easy when aspects of our life aren’t going the way we wish to allow the outside of our lives and the way we live our lives to reflect that.  Do you ever feel that way?  The Fab Five inspire us to be the best version of ourselves, an elevated version.  You still are who you are and we should celebrate that.  However, as they pointed out in the NPR interview, even airlines tell us to put on our own masks before helping others.   

We need time to replenish.  Especially when the engine is out of oil and gas, we need to tank up.  We need some time to take care of ourselves.  It isn’t being selfish!  I have to fight this mentality in my patients.  They tell themselves that they don’t want to be vain or selfish.  And I have to remind them that self-care and self-love is NOT vanity.  Trying to be your best self is NOT something to be ashamed about.  Celebrating yourself is NOT vanity.  

It is so important to have some time to invest in ourselves to be our best selves and, in that capacity, we are at our best to continue helping others.  It does take time and effort.  It takes an active push for most of us to put ourselves first, even if just a little bit.  Think of something that you consider a treat for yourself.  When is the last time you did that? Don’t get into the habit of under-valuing yourself.  Don’t allow your life to be so overwhelming that you forget to take care of your entire self.    

Today, spread love, celebrate differences and make some time to prioritize yourself! You really are worth it.      


Photo taken from NPR Morning Edition website http://bit.ly/NPRqueereye

Queer Eye cast members Jonathan Van Ness (left) and Antoni Porowski (right). Annabel Edwards/NPR 

Author
Kaete Archer, MD Facial Plastic Surgeon

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